)
Women have sex with me for a purpose. Last night one used me to time an egg.
>
> A woman phoned me and said, "Come on over. There's nobody home." I went over. Nobody was home!
>
> A hooker once told me she had a headache.
>
> I went to a massage parlor. It was self-service.
>
> I was making love to this woman and she started crying. I said, "Are you going to hate yourself in the morning?" She said, "No, I hate myself now."
>
> I knew a woman so ugly that they used her in prisons to cure sex offenders.
>
> I am such such a bad cook, if I leave dental floss in the kitchen the roaches hang themselves.
>
> I'm so ugly I stuck my head out the window and got arrested for mooning.
>
> I know I'm not sexy. When I put my underwear on I can hear the Fruit-of-the-Loom guys giggling.
> LAST ONE:
>
> My family was so poor that if I hadn't been born a boy, I wouldn't of had anything to play with.
Women have sex with me for a purpose. Last night one used me to time an egg.
>
> A woman phoned me and said, "Come on over. There's nobody home." I went over. Nobody was home!
>
> A hooker once told me she had a headache.
>
> I went to a massage parlor. It was self-service.
>
> I was making love to this woman and she started crying. I said, "Are you going to hate yourself in the morning?" She said, "No, I hate myself now."
>
> I knew a woman so ugly that they used her in prisons to cure sex offenders.
>
> I am such such a bad cook, if I leave dental floss in the kitchen the roaches hang themselves.
>
> I'm so ugly I stuck my head out the window and got arrested for mooning.
>
> I know I'm not sexy. When I put my underwear on I can hear the Fruit-of-the-Loom guys giggling.
> LAST ONE:
>
> My family was so poor that if I hadn't been born a boy, I wouldn't of had anything to play with.