Airport screening

[Kats66Pny]

Year to date statistics on Airport screening from the Department of Homeland Security:

Terrorist Plots Discovered...................................0


Transvestites................................................ 133


Hernias......................................................1,485


Hemorrhoid Cases......................................3,172


Enlarged Prostates.....................................8,249


Breast Implants........................................59,350


Pacemakers................................................5,987


Adult Depends...........................................9,871


Natural Blondes...............................................3

 

[Midlife]

And that is why I decided to drive on business travel rather than go through the airport security system. Fugh 'em!

 

[AzPete]

And that is why I decided to drive on business travel rather than go through the airport security system. Fugh 'em!

He is afraid of them finding out about the 2nd and 8th items on the list......

 

[Anonymous]

 

[Midlife]

At least I don't have to claim my ears in baggage claim!

 

[AzPete]

With those ears, he flies on his own, avoiding the groping.

 

[Gigantopithecus]

Kansas has airports?

 

[AzPete]

Kansas has airports?

The rest of us call them long dirt roads.....

 

[Gigantopithecus]

The rest of us call them long dirt roads.....

So their highways are multi-taskers? Learn something new every day.

 

[Anonymous]

My ears are carry-on luggage, thank you very much!

 

[70_Fastback]

Yeah, you just have to sit in the middle and pay for 2 extra tickets....

 

[RustyRed]

My cousin was at the airport a few weeks ago and said some guy in line in front of him thought he'd be funny and flipped them the bird when he was in the scanner and then apparently dropped an F bomb on one of the TSA people. Needless to say the guy probably missed his flight....