Favorite Dave-isms

[tarafied1]

Dave is so full of knowledge and always has great advise, but what I really like is his ability to share that wisdom in a colorful way. I thought we all probably have a favorite comment or saying from Dave. There are so many to choose from but I think the one that I just can't get out of my head is:

If I bought an old Mustang with air shocks installed and a dead rotting cat on the dashboard.... I'd remove and throw away the air shocks first.

:lol

 

[RustyRed]

Never been any wiser advise given then this...

But if you must, go with the nympho. Whichever of the five asks you if she can blow you while you're at the drive up window of your bank, go with that one. If more than one has these desires, go with the younger one.

 

[Sluggo]

Never been any wiser advise given then this...

Agreed. That is destined to be right up there with "Don't shoot 'til you see the whites of their eyes"

 

[Sluggo]

This is a pretty good one too.

An eye for a stubbed toe is my motto. You don't want to get "even" with the guy.... getting even accomplishes nothing. Your goal is to go up on the guy by the power of X5.

 

[sigtauenus]

If she giggles.... you got her! Lick your lips and immediately tell her that your gaze will not be satisfied until you've motorboat'ed them.

 

[PJ Moran]

To make sure his insurance pays...

"So, in the center console of my Jeep Wrangler is a ziplock bag with some bloody deer hair..... just in case I'm ever in a collision type accident."

 

[70 StangMan]

"Under no circumstances should your d*ck smell like a$$ after a ti*tie f*ck." :10 :10 :10

 

[blue65coupe]

Beat me to it Dale. It's an instant classic.

 

[70 StangMan]

Beat me to it Dale. It's an instant classic.

Yep, definitely my favorite Dave-ism.But I had to wait till my eyes quit watering to add it though. :rofl

 

[Anonymous]

That could possibly be the best response ever, let alone just a "Dave" response!!


:10

 

[sigtauenus]

That could possibly be the best response ever, let alone just a "Dave" response!!
:10

ROFLMAO, that's great! I missed the original post it was in, but its hilarious even without context.

 

[AzPete]

" If I wanted a beer that helped me lose weight I'd drink it at the gym, not the bar."

In reference to getting a Bud Light when ask for a Bud............

 

[opentrackerSteve]

on Fatherhood and Parenting:

unless it's really important, I just sort of kick things into a pile and wait for one of the kids to come along and hand them up to me. They're closer to the ground anyway.

 

[sigtauenus]

LOL, that was good, although I think you need context with it. Context is picking things up off the floor as you get older.

 

[pprince]

"Trust me...I can be a lot more stupid"

 

[AzPete]

How undercoating effects the top paint job.....

"You could have a 4" layer of dog crap on the underside and it wouldn't have any effect whatsoever on paint adherence/appearance on the "topside".

 

[beach pony]

"Under no circumstances should your d*ck smell like a$$ after a ti*tie f*ck." :10 :10 :10

How can ya argue with that! FUNNY AS HELL!

 

[Anonymous]

"No, it's very likely that you don't know what you're doing. Mostly because I haven't told you what you need to do."


That's classic Dave right there :lol

 

[SELLERSRODSHOP]

i like this one:

NOTHING is "your own fault". There is ALWAYS blame that can be laid on someone else.

 

[FordDude]

Clothes and sobriety are WAY over-rated. So the girl likes to get drunk and naked.... who doesn't?

Need I say more. :lol

fd