A man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by.
He gets into the taxi, and the cabbie says, "Perfect timing. You're just
like Frank."
Passenger: "Who?"
Cabbie: "Frank Feldman... he's a guy who did everything right all the
time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happened like
that to Frank Feldman every single time."
Passenger: "There are always a few clouds over everybody."
Cabbie: "Not Frank Feldman. He was a terrific athlete. He could have
won the Grand-Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang
like an opera baritone, and danced like a Broadway star. And you should
have heard him play the piano! He was an amazing guy."
Passenger: "Sounds like he was something really special."
Cabbie: "There's more. He had a memory like a computer. He remembered
everybody's birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order, and
which fork to eat them with. And he could fix anything. Not like me -
I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out. But Frank Feldman, he
could do everything right."
Passenger: "Wow, some guy then."
Cabbie: "He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid
traffic jams. Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But
Frank, he never made a mistake, and he really knew how to treat a woman
and make her feel good. He would never answer her back, even if she was
in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly
polished too. He was the perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one
could ever measure up to Frank Feldman."
Passenger: "An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?"
Cabbie: "Well... I never actually met Frank. He died, and I married his
fucking wife."
He gets into the taxi, and the cabbie says, "Perfect timing. You're just
like Frank."
Passenger: "Who?"
Cabbie: "Frank Feldman... he's a guy who did everything right all the
time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happened like
that to Frank Feldman every single time."
Passenger: "There are always a few clouds over everybody."
Cabbie: "Not Frank Feldman. He was a terrific athlete. He could have
won the Grand-Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang
like an opera baritone, and danced like a Broadway star. And you should
have heard him play the piano! He was an amazing guy."
Passenger: "Sounds like he was something really special."
Cabbie: "There's more. He had a memory like a computer. He remembered
everybody's birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order, and
which fork to eat them with. And he could fix anything. Not like me -
I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out. But Frank Feldman, he
could do everything right."
Passenger: "Wow, some guy then."
Cabbie: "He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid
traffic jams. Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But
Frank, he never made a mistake, and he really knew how to treat a woman
and make her feel good. He would never answer her back, even if she was
in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly
polished too. He was the perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one
could ever measure up to Frank Feldman."
Passenger: "An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?"
Cabbie: "Well... I never actually met Frank. He died, and I married his
fucking wife."
