This one isn't too bad of funny.

[Flysure1]

>
> Will I Live to see 80??
>
> Here's something to think about.
>
> I recently picked a new? primary care doctor.? After two visits and exhaustive Lab tests, he said I was doing 'fairly well' for my age.??
>
> A little concerned about that comment, I couldn't resist asking him, 'Do you think I'll live to be 80?'?
>
> He asked, 'Do you smoke tobacco, or drink beer or wine?'?
>
> 'Oh no,' I replied.? 'I'm not doing drugs, either!'?
>
> Then he asked, 'Do you eat rib-eye steaks and? barbecued ribs??
>
> 'I said, 'No, my former doctor said that all?red meat?is very unhealthy!'?
>
> 'Do you spend a lot of time in the sun, like playing golf, sailing, hiking, or bicycling?'?
>
> 'No, I don't,' I said.?
>
> He asked, 'Do you gamble, drive fast cars, or have a lot of sex?'?
>
> 'No,' I said?
>
> He looked at me and said,....? 'Then, why do you even give a shit?
>

 

[Midlife]

Because if I don't give a shit, I'll be constipated! And at age 80, that's not a nice condition to be in.

 

[tarafied1]

My attitude has changed a bit, it's been a year since the heart attack. I tried to be good at first but I have decided I would rather die happy than live a long time being miserable!