Need suggestions on how to find someone

[Mach1Mark]

My second son has estranged himself from me after he and his mother (my ex) had a fight several years ago. He and I were starting to rebuild our relationship after his mother and I were divorced. Ive been attempting to contact him but he hasnt answered my emails (I send him several a year) and he doesnt seem to have a very big footprint on the web. Some background: he tried to O.D. on some OTC meds shortly after I moved away to gain employment. He has been diagnosed with Bi-polar disorder. If he told me he never wanted to hear from me again (and why) I would leave him alone. Not sure if he thinks I dont love him or what but when he dropped out-of-comm it left a hole. Suggestions? Anecdotes?

 

[guruatbol]

This is sad to be sure.

Having been there a bit from his side so to speak, I can only say that you need time. Keep sending him emails or even snail mail letters telling him about what is going on in your life and that you love him. Ask him what is going on in his life. Show interest in him in your emails.

In time he may come around, but if you push, he will never come around.

Mel

 

[Jonk67]

Do the emails go through? Have they ever come back undeliverable? He could have left the account open and they're just piling up, so no real way to tell if he's reading them. Depending on the program you may be able to get a read receipt.

Other than paying ~$50? for one of those online searches to see if he's had any recent criminal activity, probably even if just a speeding ticket, and any changes of address I can't think of any. Maybe someone with PI experience will chime in.
I've had random luck with http://www.anywho.com/whitepages

Good luck,
Jon

 

[blu67]

Has he been in contact with any family members? Has he ever been in trouble with the law? (Could prison time be the answer to the lack of contact?)
I agree to keep trying to make contact.
I'm sure you tried just googling his name to see what comes up and if there were any leads to follow.
Hope you have some luck with responses here.

 

[Mach1Mark]

This is sad to be sure.

Having been there a bit from his side so to speak, I can only say that you need time. Keep sending him emails or even snail mail letters telling him about what is going on in your life and that you love him. Ask him what is going on in his life. Show interest in him in your emails.

In time he may come around, but if you push, he will never come around.

Mel

Thanks for the encouragement, Mel. Ive been reaching out to him for several years with the hopes that one day he will reply.

Do the emails go through? Have they ever come back undeliverable? He could have left the account open and they're just piling up, so no real way to tell if he's reading them. Depending on the program you may be able to get a read receipt.

Other than paying ~$50? for one of those online searches to see if he's had any recent criminal activity, probably even if just a speeding ticket, and any changes of address I can't think of any. Maybe someone with PI experience will chime in.
I've had random luck with http://www.anywho.com/whitepages

Good luck,
Jon

My emails do not bounce back as undeliverable so I have to believe he still uses the account I have. I dont think Hotmail has a read receipt option. I check the police blotter and the local paper with searches of his name. So far nothing which is a good thing.

Has he been in contact with any family members? Has he ever been in trouble with the law? (Could prison time be the answer to the lack of contact?)
I agree to keep trying to make contact.
I'm sure you tried just googling his name to see what comes up and if there were any leads to follow.
Hope you have some luck with responses here.

The courts in Alaska have a search feature, thats how I found my daughter legally changed her name recently and my ex filed for bankruptcy. So far my son is not in any proceeding, criminal or civil. His mother IS the problem which is why we had a very contentious divorce. I havent heard my sons side of what happened but I would tend to believe him before his mother based on her behavior during our separation and divorce. I havent spoken or written to my ex for years. She gave me her brief account of what happened and I know she believes what she told me. I dont take anything she says or does as the facts.