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You've got to be kidding me....

"apollard" said:
FNG here - whats MBB?
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Men Boogering Boars :ga






Actually; Myrtle Beach Bash, Ron (BP) hosts this huge beer fest, where everyone gets hammered, they watch Dave pass out on park benches and then cookies get served!!!
 
IMO,

Man tanning is for :gobp :gobp :gobp :gobp Dbl ear rings are only :ga :ga It's all a little too metrogaysexual for me.


I will go to a FEMALE massage therapist on occasion, but no way in hell will a dude ever lay hands on me. My brother is a licensed MT and owns his own place, I ask him how he can possible do that to fat, obese ugly guys (and chicks), it's all money and helping people to him. Me, it makes me do that nasty, whole body shake from the grossness of it all.



Now, I could pass on some stories that were told to me by my bro, but putting them in cyberspace is not the venue!
 
"70_Fastback" said:
What the fuck is wrong with ear rings? I have ear rings. In BOTH fucking ears too.
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Um, sorry Jamie Jeremy, real men don't wear ear-rings. Ear-rings are for women.... and maybe pirates.
 
"daveSanborn" said:
Um, sorry Jamie Jeremy, real men don't wear ear-rings. Ear-rings are for women.... and maybe pirates.
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Are you insinuating something about Jeremy being a pirate? :ga
 
"70_Fastback" said:
What the fuck is wrong with ear rings? I have ear rings. In BOTH fucking ears too.
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I can't stop this uncontrollable laughter right now. Oh my side is hurting. I am literally doubled over right now just thinking of J out in the garage punching something or asking Bonnie if she thinks he looks gay. My side is killing me. Damn I needed this. J, just don't tell us about your tramp stamp..........lmao HYSTERICALLY.
 
"daveSanborn" said:
Um, sorry Jamie Jeremy, real men don't wear ear-rings. Ear-rings are for women.... and maybe pirates.
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WTF Dave, I don't wear jewlery, wedding band being the exception. How the hell did my name drop in this convo? I don't subscribe to faganomics(fake bake, jewlery, day spas, manacures and shit).

P.S. Dave, you need to revoke you friend's man card.
 
"Snuffleupagus" said:
P.S. Dave, you need to revoke you friend's man card.
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Dave's friend doesn't have a man card - I refer you to his description of the friends wifes knowledge of the weekly beer drinking.
 
"apollard" said:
I travel to TX all the time, we have a site outside Houston.

I regret to inform you that Houston at least is full of man-tan metros, many with two earrings. You're not safe anywhere. I suggest moving farther into the country away from even medium size cities, which are infected with metrosexuals rather than what the wife calls traditional men. Charlotte NC is fookin crawling with them.

All the guys I work with in TX have traditional redneck tans- ie, they work outside, earning more than most cube workers (>110k). And tailgates on their pickups, so no issues there.
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Yeah, you're correct in certain parts of town. I don't go to Montrose and Westheimer for example.

But in my part of town (North) it's ok. Further north from me the more progressively red neck it gets.

Personally, if it were up to me....I'd move well north of where I currently live and find me several acres in BFE.
 
"silverblueBP" said:
IMO,

I will go to a FEMALE massage therapist on occasion, but no way in hell will a dude ever lay hands on me. My brother is a licensed MT and owns his own place, I ask him how he can possible do that to fat, obese ugly guys (and chicks), it's all money and helping people to him. Me, it makes me do that nasty, whole body shake from the grossness of it all.
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And that there is the reason that I have a female Doctor. When I go in for my yearly checkup, not only does she check the junk, the prostate is also on the list. :eek:mg I am not as homophobic as Dave, but I have to agree with the tanning bed thing. And earrings :barf I have enough holes in my head. fd
 
Dave, if you get the urge to get away from the freak show up there, come to the circus that IS Myrtle Beach. I'll get Jimmy Motley to build an addition to the Suck, Bang and Blow for ya, and I promise, I'll be a great teammate. Brenda won't worry about me being out having a beer with the guys twice a month. She may just get a little jealous and want to have a few herself. Oh, and hey, no earrings here and if the sun don't shine on me, I don't get tan. I'll keep looking for property for sale too, over by the Rathole! If you decide to stay up there, I'll see ya at MBB III, we'll at least be able to give you some time away from Coastal Metrosexuolina!
 
Hi Dave, sorry to hear you have to search for new friends. You buddy sounds like he's really P-whipped, It's big red flag that he has to lie about his whereabouts. Two of my friends are on very short leashes BY CHOICE. I've known these guys since high school.

Buddy #1 likes to be 'mothered'. He has always wanted to be told what to wear, what to do, ...etc, and texts her every 5 minutes. He drinks like a fish because he's in denial about being totally dependent on her. She makes more $ than him (which is no big deal), so he talked about being a house husband and raising the kids. She wouldn't let him quit his job, because she thinks he's unreliable. He also shares the same personal e-mail address with his wife, so I and my other friends constantly bombard it with smut and thong pics.

Buddy #2 has a witch for a wife. He's always dated and eventually married bossy and bitchy women. She only lets him out once or twice a year, and otherwise keeps him hidden. As a result, whenever we meet up, because he's so repressed, he drinks himself silly until he passes out.

Of course, my SWMBO has her moments. She hates this hobby, but has high self-esteem. I only lie to her about the amount of $ I spend on my car, but she probably knows. We have both separate and common interests. Luckliy, I have never been attracted to the bossy types, and will never understand people who do.

BTW, no one I know or hang out with go to tanning salons or day spas. SWMBO pestered me to try a facial with her. I hated it because I don't like strangers touching me. I was totally bummed it did not come with a happy ending.
 
"DEL65" said:
BTW, no one I know or hang out with go to tanning salons or day spas. SWMBO pestered me to try a facial with her. I hated it because I don't like strangers touching me. I was totally bummed it did not come with a happy ending.
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John, did you really think this incredible tan I have is natural? *LOL*

Dave, move to California. Sounds like it's not nearly as MetroSexual as the deep south has apparently become since I left. :ecit We don't do tanning salons, we don't do earings and we tell our wives where we went and who we went with.

At the very least, you need to start intervention with your whipped "friend".
 
You could always buy a set of "Neuticles" for your "friend".....maybe he'll get the hint,



neuticleoriginal.jpg





or not.
 
You could always buy a set of "Neuticles" for your "friend".....
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While funny, I ain't buying a guy friend of mine a pair of fake balls. Too gay for me.


Oh, and I'm not homophobic. I have no problems with peoples sexual orientation. I had a gay tenant rent our guest house for almost 2 years and as a teenager our "maid" was an old hairy french guy that pranced around the house with his vacuum. This past wednesday night at a dinner party two of the young ladies were lesbians.... one of whom was obvioously playing the role of a man. I didn't/don't care one bit.

The difference is if you're going to be a guy, be a guy. Don't hide a work organized event at the local bar from your wife because you're afraid to tell her, don't hide from your friends your weekly trips to the tanning bed, and don't try to explain to your "real men friends" that you're allowed to choose between a male or female massuese.
 
Next year for the WE gift, Dave, I'll give you a gift certificate for a tanning booth.
 
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